Not only am I a mother, but I am a black mother raising black children. One boy. Two girls. As a mother it is my job, my want, my need to protect them. From the day they are born the world tries to tell them they are not enough, less than, so it is my duty as the chosen one to bring them into this world to teach them that they are more than enough. Here are four steps we take as black parents to protect out black children.
1. Pour Into Them
Before we ever sit them down to
have “the talk” with them about the harsh realities of being born black we pour
into them. We let them know just how beautiful being black is. From their perfectly
created kinky, curly, crowns to their melanin drenched skin. Mantras and affirmations
are a part of our daily routines. They are great ways to help your child gain confidence
and self-love. The goal is to tell them who they are before the world tries to
label them.
2. Educate Them
We teach them their history....Black
History that should be being taught to them and their classmates at school. We
provide them with books that are created by people who look like them with
characters that look like them. I also find whenever I need to talk to my
children about something important, like racism, reading an age appropriate
book is a great starting point. The Conscious Kid is an amazing source for things like diverse children's books. Click here to check out their list of children’s
books that support conversations on race, racism, and resistance. We also teach
them through play. Learning through play is an important part of a child’s
development. Just like with books we are sure to provide our children with toys,
dolls, puzzles, etc. that all look like them. We take fun kid friendly
activities like painting rocks and creating chalk art and use those moments as opportunities
to spread important messages. While adorning our rocks with #BLM and drawing out
messages like “I WANT TO GROW UP” we take those opportunities to discuss
what these things mean and how we feel about them. Watching kid friendly programs
together is another great way we educate our children. Programs such as “Coming
Together: Standing Up To Racism by Sesame Street and CNN. Our youngest is five years old and
we found this to be a great way to include her into the discussions we were having
with our older children. I will say the older kids got a lot out of that program
as well.
3. Prepare Them
The last thing I want to do as a
mother is send my children out into the world unprepared. My husband and I have
open and honest conversations with them. The idea of keeping quiet in hopes of preserving
a child’s innocents does no one justice. Children live in this world with us.
They see, hear, and feel what is happening around them. The harsh reality
of things is many children have already had their own experiences with racism.
We also give direct instructions on how to handle situations, like how to
interact with law enforcements. Our son is autistic one of the most amazing
tools we’ve used was a social story created by Joy F Johnson. You can check it
out here. By preparing our children at home we are giving them a save space for
them to freely feel all their emotions, express their concerns, and ask
questions.
4. Pray
As an entire family we pray over
our children. Of course, we pray for their health and safety, but we also pray
they understand that they are perfectly and beautifully crated by God. No
mistakes were made when God gave them their beautiful brown skin and gravity
defying hair. We pray they can have a childhood and all the magic that comes
with that stage of life. We pray that our teachings are always evident in the
way they live their lives. That they live with integrity, respect, and self-love
because when you love yourself loving others is a lot easier.
Lastly, I would like to add a quick
reminder. While important, these conversations are heavy. It is extremely important
to give information along with ways to cope. Black children’s mental health
matters.
Of course, there are a ton of other ways we
protect and build up our black children, but this is pretty much the foundation in our household.
We love on them, we teach them, we prepare them, and we pray over them. Oh, and
as a friendly reminder through it all.....
Great information and good blog loving this.
ReplyDeletethank you
DeleteThat last step Pray is the first in our home! Constantly praying over my family and our safety. Uplifting preparing and encouraging them along the way! Great post!
ReplyDeleteAgreed. While the other steps are specific to my household praying over our children is an entire family affair. Before anything else we pray over them.
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